I am such a big nerd. It's OK, y'all don't have to make a fuss and say, "Oh, Josie, you're not a nerd!" because I totally know that I am. Nerd, geek, dorkasaurus, whatever you want to call it, I don't care. I've accepted it. For years, I denied it, but I am totally waving my nerd flag today.

And I said all that to say this--I love writing out lesson plans for children's choir in outline form. I love thinking about how the class should flow from beginning to end, seeing the children's faces in my mind as we move from song to song, activity to activity. I love choosing which songs they will sing in the concert. I love breaking down the songs that they're going to learn, coming up with ways for them to remember the lyrics. I love rifling through all my material, learning new ways to get them to warm up their voices and teach them about music. I find every aspect absolutely thrilling.

Just thought I'd share that with y'all.

Toodles!

If Josie Ruled The World

Something fun I found--originally titled "If Nerds Ruled The World". I changed it to suit my needs. I'll mark the ones I didn't have to change with an asterisk. I think you'll be as surprised as I at what didn't change!

+ The pen literally becomes mightier than the sword. Fencers everywhere are armed with Bics.* (Josie's note: Bics? Give me a break. It's Mont Blanc or nothing, baby.)

+ Broadway is given it's own cable channel.

+ The following dates are deemed federal holidays: the premieres of Heroes, Ugly Betty, and American Idol, as well as Project Runway and Top Chef. All offices are closed due to viewing party preparations. March 15 is also a federal holiday--the anniversary of the premiere of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

+ Stats for an ideal woman change from 36-24-36 to 780 verbal/780 math.*

+ The images of Indiana Jones, Batman, and Elle Woods become standard issue postage stamps.

+ Golf clubs, footballs, bats and other sports accoutrements are replaced with a universal Wii-mote. Also, deleting opponents becomes completely legal.*

+ Scrabulous would NEVER be blocked by work security filters.*

+ The music of Shania Twain and Lee Ann Rimes are banned.

+ Comic books would be acceptable as a standard form of currency. "Archie" comics, however, soon become like the penny and are used only to buy gumballs and accessorize loafers.*

+ No one ever laughs if you come to work hung over from last night’s Book Group.*

+ Employers give workers an hour a day (plus lunch!) to blog or frolic on the internet.

+ Bill Paxton and Bill Pullman are grafted together to create one incredibly awesome mediocre human being.* (Josie's note: You mean they aren't the same person already?)

+ “Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader” becomes “Are You Smarter Than a Tenth Grader Taking AP Classes?”*

+ Cars come with a “Damage on/off” toggle. Driving becomes a lot more fun.*

+ The following are considered felonies punishable by imprisonment to be rehabilitated: wearing sweatpants with writing on the derrière; wearing sweatpants outside of the home; skirts 5 inches or more above the knee in women over 35; socks with sandals; pantyhose with open-toed shoes; pantyhose darker than your shoes; sagging pants.

+ Advertising and coverage for the Scripps National Spelling Bee is as prolific as the Super Bowl.

+ "Bad Hair Day" and "Hated Everything In My Closet" become plausible excuses to use sick days.

+ "Make It So" replaces "Git 'Er Done," a phrase never uttered again except in alcohol-fueled lexiconic accidents. Even then, please-- just don't do it.*

Obsession Tuesday: Internet Edition

I don't think it comes to a surprise to anyone reading this blog that maybe I spend a little too much time on the internet. In honor of that obsession, I present to you Obsession Tuesday: Internet Edition. (I wish I had some cool theme music, like on Law & Order. Bong-Bong!) These links represent the websites I've been hitting hard lately. Let the mouse-clicking begin! Bong-Bong!

Allrecipes.com This new metabolic diet I'm on calls for lots of chicken breast, turkey, and vegetables, so I'm clicking like a fiend to find healthy dishes that we can eat as a family. If you have any recipes or website links, email me or leave them in the comments.

Bee-Boppin' the Boroughs You've probably seen this site on my links list. Visit it--I implore you! These girls walk through different parts of New York City each Saturday, taking pictures along the way, and posting them on their blog. The girls are lots of fun, and filled with silliness. It's inspiring me to take Beth and our kids out around Georgetown and snap pictures.

The Multiverse This link ties two of my greatest obsessions--television and the internet. The theory at work in this website is that most shows on television (past and present) are connected, all starting with St. Elsewhere and Homicide: Life On The Street. You may not know this, but St. Elsewhere's series finale revealed that the entire show was the dream of an autistic child, Tommy Westphall. Therefore, all shows connected with St. Elsewhere are also part of Tommy's dream. The website has a grid, and a key to the grid. A must for television geeks like me.

You Look Fab I've been dressing a certain way for a couple of years, due in joint to my weight gain and working in a super casual office environment. Now that I've begun a weight-loss program, I need to learn how to dress myself again. My shape hasn't quite begun to change, but when it does, this site is going to come in extra handy. What I like about this blog is that she writes about style, fashion, and trends, but she also applies these topics so that the everyday woman can relate. She also talk about the different body types, and how the current trends affect them.

That's it for now...happy clicking! You can also leave the websites you're obsessed with currently in the comments.

Obsession Tuesday

Yes, I know that it's supposed to be "Obsession Wednesday", but we'll have to talk about tonight's American Idol tomorrow. I think from now on, it's going to be "Obsession Tuesday". Onward!

Reading: Selected Poems, by ee cummings. I believe cummings got a footnote when I studied American poetry my junior year of high school. That little footnote grabbed my attention, and I've been hooked ever since. His wordplay, his lyricism, his modernist look at language is still refreshing, even though his poems were written in the early part of the 20th century.

Wearing: Mineral makeup! I picked this stuff up at Wal-Mart (Because what can't you find at Wal-Mart? I mean, except what you go in looking for!) on a whim, because all the cosmetic companies are putting out a mineral line. I thought I'd give it a try. It took me a day or two to get used to it, but once I did--WOW! It stays on all day--no fading. When I went home last night, I looked in the mirror (naturally) and my makeup looked just as good as it did when I had put it on at 8 that morning. And isn't that what we're looking for in cosmetics?

Watching: Project Runway, on Bravo. I've been watching this show since the first season. I love the idea of a reality show based on fashion designers, because they are notorious for being a whiny, cat-fighting bunch. Project Runway delivers big on drama, plus we get awesome challenges like "make an evening gown out of recycled materials". Seriously, that was a challenge last season. This season, we've seen challenges like "pilfer the Hershey store in Times Square and make a look that reflects that whimsy", "design a look for Tiki Barber" and "design a prom gown for Catholic School girls". Also? There's a dude that cries every episode. It doesn't matter if he's happy, sad, mad, whatever. He's crying, and I love it.

Doing: Putting together an Elvis puzzle! I bought this puzzle as a project for Cathryn and I to complete together, but after about five minutes, Cathryn lost interest, and now it's my solo project. I love it, though. I love puzzles in general, and found myself working on the frame last night while watching American Idol. I even decided to forgo makeup and breakfast at home this morning to try and complete the frame. Hey, if you're going to do something, you may as well throw yourself into 100%, don't you think?

Thames Day Out

Recently, Richie began collecting coins. It's been uplifting to see him have a hobby; to see him take an interest in something that's fun for him, and is just for him. For so long, he invested his life into giving Trey opportunities, and gave no thought to his own wants. I've really tried to encourage this hobby, because he certainly has been supportive of all my obsessions. He found this particular book that he wants, so he called Barnes & Noble, and they reserved it for him. We decided not to tell Cathryn, because we didn't want to have to tell her if our plans happened to fall through.

This morning, we set out for Barnes & Noble (I drank white tea, not coffee!) and listened to the spring musical. It's so fun to hear Cathryn sing the songs, and repeat the lines. Another perk to being the choir director--you know your kid is going to know their lines. It was nice just to drive someplace together, and have conversations about the things that mattered to us. At the moment, it's Trey beginning his spring semester at Coker, coin collecting, the spring musical, and whether or not American Idol should allow professionals to audition. (More on that later.)

Y'all, I love Barnes & Noble. It's not to say that I don't love Books-A-Million. OK, I don't. I like Books-A-Million, but I love Barnes & Noble. To me, Books-A-Million is the Wal-Mart of bookstore chains. I know that Barnes & Noble is a bookstore chain, too, but there's just something so much more dignified about it. Barnes & Noble takes itself and it's business very seriously, and Books-A-Million really doesn't. You can feel it when you walk in, seriously.

Richie went to customer service to pay for his reserved book, and Cathryn and I headed straight for the children's section. Is it any surprise that I love the children's section? It's so full of whimsy and wonder, and the clerks don't mind if you sit in the floor and read to your kid. Which is exactly what Cathryn and I did, with nary an eyebrow raised at us. We read "Knuffle Bunny" by Mo Willems and "Knuffle Bunny, too", it's sequel. Have you read any Mo Willems books to your children? Run, do not walk, to your local Barnes & Noble and read Mo Willems. He also writes for "The Kids Next Door", the best cartoon on Cartoon Network beside "Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends". (Bloo might be my favorite character EVER.)

Once Cathryn had successfully chosen a book to purchase (Junie B. Jones, a plucky first grader a lot like our plucky first grader), Richie took Cathryn to Starbucks so I could browse. I browsed the Art Section (I found an excellent beginners sewing book I'd like to try one day), Travel (hello, pretty picture books of New York, Ireland, And France..), Reference (where I got bogged down looking at Elmore Leonard's "10 Rules For Writing", "The Writers Reference 2007", and several other books perfect for word-nerds like me.) and Poetry when Cathryn and Richie came bouncing back up to me. Naturally, the Poetry section begins where the Romance section ends, and I got a nice little smirk from Richie. I rolled my eyes and defended myself, pointing to the poetry books and pulling down a thick ee cummings volume, because I would never buy a romance novel from Barnes & Noble. I would buy it from Wal-Mart or the grocery store the way God intended.

After leaving the hallowed bookstore (where, upon checking out, I practically tripped over my own feet staring at the deluxe Scrabble and Monopoly sets), we stopped at this restaurant called "The Filling Station" and had a nice meal together of pizza an spaghetti. The big, big bonus? Dessert pizzas. Oh, yes. Hot, gooey chocolate chip dessert. Yeah, I know I fell off the wagon. But the beauty in falling off the wagon is that you can always get back on again.

For once, Coastal Grand was not busy. It was nice to walk the mall without the fear of being crushed. I don't ever worry about being run over, because I'm usually the one doing the running. We took Cathryn to Claire's to spend her gift card that she had gotten for Christmas. Correction--I took Cathryn into Claire's while Richie sat in the Food Court. He understands that there are some places a man just cannot go, and Claire's is one of them. It's a young girl's paradise. She bought a real crown (naturally), two trinket boxes, two bottles of nail polish (which kills me because you can get nail polish SO CHEAP elsewhere, and he's she's paying $2.50 a bottle), a feathered mask, and a gold bangle bracelet. Little girl heaven, I tell you.

On our way to Bed, Bath, and Beyond (because I had a gift card to burn), several prom dresses caught Cathryn's eye. "I like the black one, Mama," she told me. "I like the red one," I replied. "Don't worry, Cathryn. We'll get you a pretty prom dress. I'll make sure you go to the prom," Richie told Cathryn as he squeezed my hand. I wanted to cry--I didn't go to either of my proms. My parents wouldn't let me. It was so sweet to hear that Richie shared my dream of wanting to do for Cathryn all the things my parents wouldn't do for me.

Bed, Bath, and Beyond is a fascinating store. Not as great as Barnes & Noble, mind you, but there's something intriguing about a store where the towels go all the way to the ceiling. I was a little overwhelmed, because I'm not a very domestic person. I didn't even pick out the furniture in our house--I left that task to Richie, whose eye I trust much, much more than mine. So I went in there with a specific task in mind--find something to hang on the wall, so I don't have to shove my flat iron and hairdryer underneath my sink. I ended up finding this great chrome tiered shelf, and also a a chrome wall-mounted door hook, so that I can hang both my robe and Cathryn's robe and I can quit fiddling with clothes hangers. They're so frustrating.

It was just such a nice, peaceful day for all of us. I'm looking forward to tomorrow.

Toodles!

RIP, Nerdmobile!

Several years ago, in a postpartum delirium, I convinced Richie to trade in my (our) beloved Isuzu Rodeo for a Ford Windstar. Richie begged me, implored me not to get a minivan. He offered to buy me a Yukon, a Tahoe, an Expedition. But I was resolute--it had to be a minivan. It's a decision that I regretted a month after the purchase when Richie took the Windstar to the IP Classic and brought it home keyed. A month after that, Easter weekend, I drove the blasted thing to Wal-Mart and returned to find that someone had driven into the passenger side. The final nail in the coffin, though, was late at night while I was driving home. I was sitting at a red light, and it suddenly hit me--I was 25 years old, and drove a minivan, even though all I had to transport was one infant. Richie took Trey to school in his truck. That was the night I christened it the Nerdmobile.

The misfortunes that plagued the Nerdmobile were countless. We had to replace the transmission. I've had more flat tires than I care to mention, and I soon realized that I wasn't comfortable driving such a bulky vehicle, and began to rack up a few dings and dents. Slowly, it really began to earn the nickname I had given it. Lights began to turn on and off arbitrarily on the console. I was heavily displeased with that vehicle, but I was determined to keep it, no matter how much I hated it, because it was me who had lobbied Richie so hard for it. I was going to drive that thing until we paid it off, or the wheels fell off, which ever happened first.

Tuesday November 13, the wheels fell off sooner than I had expected. After my lunch, I cranked the Windstar up, and the odometer was nothing but dashes. The air conditioning blew nothing but hot air, and as I made my way down the road, I noticed that my speedometer was stuck on zero. I had hit a high frenzy by the time I got back to the office, and Richie threw up his hands and said he'd had enough of that vehicle. He got on the phone, and after work, we took the Nerdmobile to Moncks Corner. At ten pm, a cute little Grand Vitara was sitting in my driveway.

Y'all, it's so cute. It's white, and not bulky, and the cruise control works, and it's got a built-in CD player. It's sporty and has plenty of room in the back. It's small enough for me to handle, but roomy enough to be a family car for all four of us when Trey comes home to visit. It reminds me of my (our) Rodeo, and is beyond fun to drive. Not too much fun, though! I don't want any tickets. Sure, I couldn't remember how to turn the windshield wipers on Thursday morning, and I lost it in the Wal-Mart parking lot because I forgot that I didn't have a big honking minivan anymore. As I told Richie the other day, I feel like a person again.

So if you see a happy, smiling woman behind the wheel of a White Grand Vitara, wave--it's me!